Welcome .. please, come in and share a bit of Monday morning with me … bring your own coffee, though. It has been a rather gloomy weekend for Filosofa. Thunderstorms have hung around all weekend, which I really don’t mind, but a little sunshine might have been nice. My daughter was out of town on a trip to Virginia Beach for four days, and of course we missed her, since she is the only one in the family that actually talks every now and then! But more practically, it meant double-duty on such things as litter-box scooping and trash-taking-out for Miss Goose and me. Add to that a few other stresses, and all in all I am ready for Monday! I shall do my best to be funny, but if you detect some snarkiness somewhere, just chalk it up to climate change. Now grab your coffee … Hugh and I will be having …
Wedding guests for rent …
Do you know someone who is planning a wedding but having trouble finding guests who are willing to spend an entire day in fancy clothes just to watch them mumble a few words and share a kiss? Well, if they live in Oregon, I just might have a solution! Mtn Peaks Therapy Llamas & Alpacas, a non-profit animal therapy organization, will rent out llamas and alpacas to attend weddings!
“Our animals are ‘pros’ when it comes to parties and special events, always decorated to compliment, our llamas can easily handle all ages, and any size of crowd! More than just ‘entertainment,’ we provide a unique interactive experience for your guests, that most have never experienced before, and smiles that will last forever!”
All proceeds from the animal wedding packages, which start at $200 and $300 for two, go toward funding the organization’s Therapy and Education Program. I’m not quite sure whether the llamas get the therapy or they are rather like therapy dogs, providing solace for people in need. After much (at least 30 seconds) thought, I believe the llamas are in need of therapy after having to attend all those weddings. Did I mention that I dislike weddings? The last one I attended was in 1997.
If it were not all the way on the other side of the country, I would swear this next story involved one of the forced llama wedding participants …
Llama on the Lam …
Early Thursday morning, just before 1:00 a.m., two troopers from the State Police Russell (Massachusetts) barracks responded to reports of a loose llama walking on Route 23 in Russell. Troopers Matthew Kane and Kyle Minnicucci responded and located a llama out on the lam from its home. After visiting several houses in the area, trying to locate the llama’s family, the troopers decided to arrest the llama on charges of ‘public nuisance’, but they realized they had no means of transporting him to the jail. So instead, they asked a local horse farm owner to take the llama for the night until his family could be located.
No word on whether the llama’s family has been found, but all charges against the llama have been dropped.
Who Is Shaving Virginia’s Cats?
An unknown perpetrator is shaving (apparently) random cats across Waynesboro, Virginia, police there said Friday.
Since December, at least seven cats have been abducted and let loose again with their underbellies or legs carefully shorn, according to the Associated Press.
The felines, who all have collars and owners, have so far been returned otherwise unharmed, and even the seemingly baffled police aren’t exactly sure what, if any, law the perpetrator is breaking.
Which means that, for now, at least, Waynesboro’s cats might have to look out for themselves. Stay safe out there, cats of Waynesboro.
The Religious Feud in England Over … Asparagus?
Now, let me say right off that I make it a habit never to mock anybody’s religion. I also do not wish to offend any of my UK friends. Nor do I have anything against asparagus, though it is not my favourite veggie. But this story was just too good to pass up.
On Sunday, April 23rd, churchgoers at England’s Worcester Cathedral were treated to an unusually fragrant and spiky service. To kick off the annual Asparagus Festival, the church decided to dedicate a few minutes of mass to a ceremonial blessing of this unique vegetable. During the ceremony, a man in a suit and tie carried a bundle of the vegetable to the front of the church, the Telegraph reports. He was followed by Gus the Asparagus Man—a man costumed as a spear of asparagus, and a frequent sight at Asparagus Festival events—and someone dressed up as St. George, shield and all. The cathedral’s Precentor then blessed the crop.
Not everyone was happy. “This is an absurd pantomime-type scene that makes a mockery of Christian worship,” the leader of one lobbyist group told the Telegraph. A popular religious blogger took the trend to what he said was its natural conclusion: “Where’s the sprout liturgy, or equality for mushrooms? Would the Dean really permit a walking fungus to participate in an act of divine worship?” Anything for an argument, I s’pose.
To me, the only real question is: why asparagus??? I can eat the very thin, young asparagus, if doused in enough butter and lemon juice, but I would much prefer bell peppers, celery, carrots, scallions, or even broccoli!
And on that note, it is time for some of you to straighten those ties, stick a pen or two in your pocket-protectors, and head on out the door … go earn a few bucks. And please, remember to share a smile with somebody today. Keep safe and have a great week!