Bring It On, Monday!

Monday-flutter-birdGood Monday Morning, fellow travelers!  I hope that you had a restful weekend and are ready to jump back into the fray of madness this morning! I was more than ready to write something light and humorous this morning, so I was happy to find a number of fun stories filling my inbox and postie-notes.

So, pull up a coffee and grab some chair … no wait … grab some coffee and pull up a chair … and let us try to find something to laugh about before we must set out and face the cold, cruel world. Although I’m sure mine aren’t as good as Mary’s, I made scones, so help yourself!  Oh … and Hugh … I splurged and got you a little extra treat …

When this story first caught my eye, I was sure it was going to be about somebody having thrown their alarm clock into the wall, and I thought it would be a perfect way to lead on a Jolly Monday post.  Turns out, the story isn’t quite … what bird??? … what I first thought, but still funny.

Monday-alarmBack in 2004 in a community outside of Pittsburgh, homeowner Jerry Lynn was attempting to do some home repairs. Part of his plan was to drill a hole in the living room wall to install a television … I am assuming one of those wall-mount, flat-screen things.  Well, he got a smart idea to tie a battery-operated alarm clock to a string and lower it into the ductwork in order to determine where, precisely, to drill the hole.  I’m guessing he was seeking a wall stud, but I know from experience that there are better ways to locate a stud (no jokes here, please).  Anyway, as luck would have it, Jerry accidentally let go of the string and the clock dropped.

Presumably Jerry found another method for drilling his hole and mounting the television, while his long-suffering wife Sylvia went to Target and bought another alarm clock.  That evening at precisely 7:50 p.m., they heard a sound … the alarm clock stuck in the ductwork was ringing.  I don’t know why these people had their alarm set for evening … perhaps one or both work nights … but ring it did.  That evening … and the next … and the next.  For 13 years that clock has been ringing every evening at the same time!

Monday-Energizer-bunnyGiven that it was a battery operated clock, and did not even have an Energizer battery but merely a Rayovac, the Lynns were certain it would die within a few months.  WRONG!  After 13 years – 4,732 annoying rings – Jerry Lynn sought help (no, not psychiatric help, though in my opinion … ) and hired a professional heating & cooling company to extricate the clock.  I hear that Silvia dared Jerry to ever do home repairs again.  My solution would have been to tie a strong magnet onto a long pole, like perhaps a mop handle, and try to get the clock that way, but then … what do I know?  And I also wonder … why bother to pay to have it removed after 13 years?  Surely they were inured to it by then???

Monday-flutter-bird-2.gifI know little-to-nothing about boats.  I do have a funny personal story about one, though.  Many years ago when my husband was alive, I answered the phone to a man on the other end saying that he was calling about the boat we had advertised in the local paper.  Actually, we hadn’t and didn’t even own a boat, which I told him.  He said, “Are you sure?”  I said yes, I was quite sure, then he replied, rather belligerently, “Let me talk to your husband.” Either he thought I was lying, or too stupid (being a woman, y’know) to know if we owned a boat.  Sigh.  Anyway … here is the story I meant to tell you before I got side-tracked …

A 37-foot motorboat can cost up to … well, a lot of money.  I tried to do some quick and dirty research, but got so many varied estimates that I gave up.  The most expensive I saw was $499,000.  So why would you buy an expensive boat and leave it lying alongside the highway? what bird???

July 7 (UPI) – “Police in New Jersey are trying to figure out who abandoned a 37-foot boat at the side of a busy highway.

The South Brunswick Police Department tweeted a photo Thursday afternoon showing the boat, named Maraliya, at the side of Route 1, about 40 miles southwest of New York City.

Monday-boat.jpgThe police said the boat, labeled as being based out of Larchmont, N.Y., was at the side of the road for about five hours before being removed by officers.”

I wonder … if nobody claims the boat, do they raffle it off?  And shouldn’t a boat have something similar to the Vehicle Identification Number (VIN) on cars … perhaps a BIN?  And … was the boat abandoned because it was used in the commission of a crime?  So many questions …

And speaking of things found alongside the road … what would you surmise about a wedding dress left on a road named Bridle Road?  It’s true … I swear to you I don’t make this stuff up!

Monday-wedding-dressEventually an unnamed woman came forward to claim the dress, saying it had fallen out of her vehicle.  Now, there is something fishy going on here.  First, as you are driving along, how does an article of clothing just “fall” out of your car.  And a wedding dress?  And the name of the road … Bridle Road.  Sure, Bridle sounds just like ‘bridal’, but I’m more along the lines of thinking ‘bridle’, as in ‘reined in’, controlled …

And then there is what she did with the dress after she recovered it from the police … she took it to a consignment shop!  Trust me here … this lady does NOT plan to get married any time soon!Monday-flutter-bird-3

Spike is his name; art is his game. Spike is six months old and lives in Japan with his girl Mandy, where he creates works of art.  Spike is a … er … um … stag beetle.  Mandy also has three other stag beetles as pets:  Sally, Julius and Cleo. (Two males & two females … I have to ask … how does one determine the gender of a beetle???) In Japan, cats and dogs are less popular as pets, because of limited living space, so most kids have somewhat smaller friends for those moments when they need something with which to … snuggle.  Says Mandy, “Like any small pet, they’re not affectionate, but they’re very fun to watch, especially docus species. If you are careful you can handle them, although some species are more aggressive than others.”

Spike’s art went viral about a week ago when he got his own Twitter and Instagram accounts, where he exhibits his artwork.  Mandy is planning to auction his paintings, with 15% of the proceeds from that auction going toward “stag conservation.” When Mandy, an English teacher, put a few of Spike’s drawings on Ebay, the top bid was $150!  Not bad for a little guy … you can buy a lotta bananas, Spike’s favourite food, with $150!

And on that note …what bird??? …  it is time to rinse out the cups, put on the ties and let’s all get out and find somebody to share a smile with!  I challenge you today to give out three unsolicited smiles!  Keep safe and have a great week!  Hugs ‘n love from Filosofa!



23 thoughts on “Bring It On, Monday!

  1. Boats left. Yeah, bound to happen.
    “Honey, is it me or is the old four by four riding lighter?”
    “Well you wouldn’t believe it, but the boat has come unhooked?”
    “Well shooty-durns. Wonder how long for?”
    “Maybe we should turn back and get it?”
    “On this highway? We got another 50 miles to go before we can turn off!”
    “If we do that we’ll miss Game of Thrones!…I just can’t figure out how to work that ‘Record’ on that new 80″ screen tv,”
    “Hell no! I’ll just phone up old Uncle Don’ and he’ll buy me another. Not like he’s got much else to do at that Whitehouse,”

    Liked by 1 person

  2. Thirteen years?! I thought I was going to go insane when I couldn’t figure out how to turn off a stopwatch alarm that went off in the middle of the night a few times in a row. I tossed that sucker in the yard and wouldn’t you know my son found it and put it back in my room (which I discovered when it went off yet again in the middle of the night).

    Liked by 2 people

  3. Terrific stuff. And “Famous Grouse” is my favorite Scotch! How did you know!!!??? By the way, my theory about the abandoned boat is that someone left it there to await the rising sea levels. He will be ready when everyone else is trying to see how long they can tread water! Have a Happy Week! 😄

    Liked by 2 people

    • I’m glad to have made you smile. I knew about the Famous Goose because you mentioned it a month or so ago in a comment to another Monday post! My memory isn’t generally that good, but it stuck in my mind because a) i had never heard of it, and b) we call my granddaughter by the nickname “Goose”. 😀

      You may be right about the boat! Sound reasoning, except the cops have it now. 🙂
      Have a great week, Hugh!

      Liked by 1 person

  4. Pingback: Bring It On Monday! – The Militant Negro™

  5. Dear Jill,
    You do such a great job with these Monday posts. Now why would anyone wait 13 years to get rid of something annoying (not man or beast) .I can’t believe having a beetle for a pet? Only in Japan. That woman did not want that dress. I have enjoyed my tea and delicious scones along with your blog.
    Thanks and Hugs, Gronda

    Liked by 1 person

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