Jolly Monday … Stuff ‘n More Stuff

Neither fools nor angst nor Trump nor rabbit holes stay Jill & Jolly from bringing humour to their friends.

And thus, here we are, a bit ruffled, a bit worn and torn, but nonetheless doing what we can to find humour amid the rubble.

We apologize, but you’ll find the smorgasbord a bit limited today … no sweets, for I have run out of sugar and apparently there was a run on it, as there is none at the grocery.  And no bacon, for the store had only one brand and it was $6.99 a pound!!!  When the day comes that I pay $7 for a lousy pound of bacon, you’ll know I’ve lost the last of my marbles!  I best be careful, though, for I remember back in the early 1970s when I made the claim that I would never pay $1 for a gallon of gasoline!

Anyway, I asked Jolly to scrounge around in the pantry and see what he could find, so grab a bite, a cuppa, and let’s see if we can find a chuckle somewhere in here, shall we?

JOLLY!!!!  You weren’t supposed to take a bit of everything!  And … onions?  Oh Jolly, you even spilt the coffee!  Sigh … ah well, you did the best you could.  Sorry, folks … there’s a Taco Bell just across the street if you’d like to go get a snack.  We’ll do better next week!


Beer please?

Olive Veronesi is 93 and lives alone in the tiny community of Seminole, Pennsylvania, population 84.  Seminole used to have their own post office, until it closed in September 2002, but they do still have their own zip code!  Now, my friend Herb lives in Pennsylvania, though not Seminole, and from him I know that Governor Wolf ordered all liquor stores shut down last month, saying they aren’t considered an ‘essential business’.  Some might argue that point.  Anyway … I digress.

Last week, Olive ran out of … beer!  GASP!!!  She was seen holding a sign from her window …Olive-beerNews station KDKA-TV shared a photo on Facebook where it went viral (some people have far too much time on their hands these days!).  Several neighbors offered to get her some beer, but the real kicker was when Coors Light said in a Twitter post that Veronesi would soon be receiving some beer directly from the company! Olive-CoorsHmmmm … I wonder … if I stand in my window with my empty wine bottle and a sign, do you think the company might send me a case?


Emergency???

There are many reasons one might call 9-1-1, or in the UK, 9-9-9.  A burglary in progress, someone having a heart attack, a missing child, domestic violence.  But this was a new one, and I cannot begin to imagine the thought processes of the person who called the emergency police number.

It happened in the UK when a call came in to the Essex Police Department’s emergency number.  The caller wished to report that he/she could hear a neighbor … snoring.  Yep, folks … snoring.snoreNow, my neighbors have a teenage son, and sometimes he likes the music a bit loud … um, to the point it shakes the pictures on my walls, but even so, I would not call 9-1-1!!!  Sheesh.

The police advised the caller that “snoring is never a reason to call 999, no matter how annoying it is.”  Here, the caller would likely have been fined, and rightly so!


Oops!

Volunteer firefighter Charles Calvin of New Chicago, Indiana (not to be confused with plain ol’ Chicago in Illinois) needed to withdraw $200 from the ATM to do a bit of shopping last weekend.  So, while he was at it, he thought he would check and see if his $1,700 stimulus check had been deposited to his account yet.  Imagine his surprise when the machine spit out a receipt that said his balance was $8.2 million!  Needless to say, there was a mistake and the bank sorted it all on Monday.  Charles said he wasn’t sure if the error was on the part of his bank, or by the IRS as they arranged the direct deposit of his check.  I’m betting the latter.  Said Charles …

“It kind of sucks. You go from being a millionaire one second then back to being broke again. But hey, once you’re poor you don’t have anywhere else to go but up.”


And Oops again!

Nick Blanusha of plain ol’ Chicago in Illinois (not to be confused with New Chicago in Indiana) also had a financial oops last week!  He went to the grocery store to pick up the order he had placed online earlier, and paid for the order totaling $90.96 with his debit card.

“I signed the receipt got in my car and then went home to check my bank account to see if my stimulus check had hit and, uh, noticed that it was empty. And I looked back at the receipt and noticed I had been charged $11,500.”

He immediately contacted the store but was told it would take up to five business days to refund the money to his account!!!  At this point, I would have been at the store cracking some heads!

Nick, however, did a very smart thing (most people are smarter than me in such situations) and contacted Chicago television station WLS-TV.  Funny how well that worked!  It wasn’t long before Nick received a call from the grocery store’s corporate offices, apologizing profusely and the very next day, refunded the entire amount of the charge, including the $90.96 for his order.  Plus, they promised to pay any overdraft fees he might incur as a result of the error.


Just enough time left for some ‘toons ‘n memes … let’s see what we can find over at Phil’s Phun

toon-1toon-2toon-3toon-4toon-5toon-6toon-7toon-8

meme-7meme-6meme-5meme-4meme-3

meme-2

No, I swear this is not me!!!

meme-1


And last, but certainly not least, we’ve got time for a short cute animal video … you’ll love this one!


This one’s for Hugh … thought you might need this today, my friend!

MaxineMonday-famous-grouse


jollyHave a great decent week, my friends … get outside, enjoy the beauty of nature, go for long walks … anything to take your mind off of … stuff.  Much love and many hugs from Filosofa and Jolly!

39 thoughts on “Jolly Monday … Stuff ‘n More Stuff

  1. Pingback: A Jolly & Joyful Monday! | Filosofa's Word

  2. Fortunately, I have a marvelous variety of bags of flavored coffee weighing down one pantry shelf and a refrigerator with a more than adequate supply of half & half. The pastries, however, are dwindling and need to be replenished on eldest Daughter’s next market visit…as my baking skills are limited at best. The Wine is also mysteriously disappearing, thank goodness for Daughter and Wine.com, else I could become that sign holding “Dignified Lady of a Certain Age” in the window! I’ll leave the table scraps for Jolly and you, especially the detested onions, but thanks for trying to be generous hosts during these troubled times. Otherwise, Jolly Monday hits the spot and provides smiles and laughter which are as much needed as the sustenance today and everyday. No doubt Hugh is smiling hughly (hugely) with his bottle of juice. The video is too cute and Benjamin will love it, whenever in the future he will be able to return. I’m fairly certain that is not Punxsutawney Phil, as his diet is carefully maintained and probably does not include pizza. The groundhog in the video will soon hold a sign that says “need more pizza” though the dogs most likely would not comply with his request. Thank-you!

    Liked by 1 person

    • I’m glad you had your own coffee! Jolly had made the cup that got spilled just for you, with your favourite half-and-half, and then he tripped while bringing it in. I’m always amazed when you say you aren’t a very good cook or baker, for somehow I think you would be great at anything you put your mind to. You don’t like onions??? GASP! 🙃 As I will tell you in a bit when I respond to your email from the wee hours, I am glad you’ve pointed me in the direction of Wine.com! Oh yeah … give Hugh a bottle of Famous Grouse and a Maxine comic and he’s happy for a while. That was definitely NOT Punxsutawney Phil, for he’s afraid of his own shadow and would no doubt have been petrified of those dogs, whereas this guy just went on calmly eating his slice of pizza! Ha ha … yes, I can see the groundhog with such a sign. I do hope Benjamin gets to see this one, for I immediately thought of him as soon as I saw it. Hugs, sweet friend!

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      • If you wish to become somewhat enlightened about my cooking skills, find JoyRoses April 15th post “A Tasty, Accidental Recipe” and scroll way down to my comment. Pretty much sums it up! The missing husband was a chef, in the end it was his only redeeming quality. The loss of the chef far outweighed the loss of the husband! I do not like onions in any way, shape or form. I will use onion powder, only when it is absolutely necessary for flavor, but that is it! I never, ever had an onion enter my house until somehow my Son discovered the vile things and insisted upon having IT when we had cookouts. It was placed upon his poor unsuspecting burger or hot dog. A waste, in my opinion, of a perfectly good burger and hot dog. I did draw the line at any of the diced or sliced remnants of the despicable thing finding its way into and contaminating my refrigerator. It was trash even before it became part of the trash…outdoors! In case you did not get the intended message here : I DETEST ONIONS! Thank-you!!

        Liked by 1 person

        • I did go back and find Carolyn’s post, read your comment, chuckled and responded … not just with a ‘like’, either, but with real words! You do … cook with onions … sometimes … right? I mean, what’s a beef roast or stew, or potato salad … without … 🧅???

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    • I found one other comment in spam … who knows why??? But I don’t know what happened to the third … cyberspace monsters must have eaten it for breakfast! Anyway, I’m glad you enjoyed the post … take care and have a decent week! ❤

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  3. Perfect for a rainy Monday morning to lend some much needed cheer. I love that Coors are sending Olive beer and I particularly enjoy the animal pictures, cartoons and jokes – thank you!

    Liked by 2 people

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