Given the state of the world, we can all use a bit of a chuckle, but sometimes it’s really hard to find! Well, I found mine over at the Smorgasbord Blog earlier today — I even laughed! And then I thought that it was rather selfish of me to keep these chuckles for myself, so I decided to share them with you guys! Thanks, Sally et al!
My sister Diana and her friends passed along these legal gems and we hope you enjoy..
Plus…How Do Court Reporters Keep Straight Faces?
These are from a book called Disorder in the Courts and are things people actually said in court, word for word, taken down and published by court reporters that had the torment of staying calm while the exchanges were taking place:
ATTORNEY: What was the first thing your husband said to you that morning?
WITNESS: He said, ‘Where am I, Cathy?’
ATTORNEY: And why did that upset you?
WITNESS: My name is Susan!
_______________________________
ATTORNEY: What gear were you in at the moment of the impact?
WITNESS: Gucci sweats and Reeboks.
____________________________________________
ATTORNEY: What is your date of birth?
WITNESS: July 18th.
ATTORNEY: What year?
WITNESS: Every year.
_____________________________________
ATTORNEY: How old is your son, the one living with you?
WITNESS: Thirty-eight or thirty-five, I can’t remember…
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Good share Jill.
Thanks
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Glad you enjoyed it!!!
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😀😅
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Hello Jill. I want to echo the rest and give you a thank you and tell you I enjoyed the fun break from the news of the day. Thank you for introducing me to another grand blog, I have a feeling I will be reading more of the posts there. Hugs
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I’m so glad you enjoyed it! Indeed, we all need to step back from the news of the day for just a bit, to find humour, to smile and maybe even laugh. I subscribed to the blog years ago on … I think David’s suggestion … but rarely actually read it. Michael mentioned it last week, so I decided to check it out and this was the first post that came up! Kismet, eh? Hugs
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Hello Jill. Like all blogs it has things we are interested in and things that we are not. As an example, for me poetry is a dark hole in space, I just don’t understand it. But some of the other posts I did enjoy and understand. That was a grand experience I wouldn’t have had without your mentioning the site. As with my own blog I feel not every post is for everyone, they get to pick and choose what they want to experience / view. You do grand work Jill, I am not sure how you find the energy / time to read and comment on other’s blogs while researching your own posts, reading so many political articles, and then writing so many grand posts on them. I am …Ehm … well younger than you and I find I struggle to even keep up with half of what you do. My best wishes and respect to yourself, your family, and all the little ones with tails that keep you engaged in life. I look forward to your posts for a generation to come. Hugs
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I am EXACTLY like you when it comes to poetry, Scottie! I don’t understand subtle nuances and such … I like to be able to take what I’m reading at face value, to assume the words mean precisely what they say!
Thank you so much for your kind words, my friend! You’ve brought a big smile to my face, for sure. I do work hard on my blog, sometimes spending 12 hours a day (or more) between researching, writing, editing, revising, answering comments, and trying to visit at least a few of my friends’ blogs each day. But you know … it’s what makes me feel that I’m contributing somehow, like maybe what I do has value to someone … and what you just said reaffirms that, makes me feel that it IS worth the time and headaches! I can’t promise “a generation to come” but I will keep on doing what I do as long as I can! I hope that someday things will calm down and I can write about more hopeful, positive things! Hugs
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Thanks for sharing the laughter Jill.. we certainly do all need some humour in our lives…xx
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Today more than ever! I think I have a permanent scowl etched into my face! Thank YOU for providing the humour! xx
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Hope the weekend proves to be more uplifting Jill…hugsx
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Thank you! I’m sure it will be! Hugs to you, my friend! xx
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I clicked through to the reblogged post and cracked up on the punchline to the truncated quote; repeating it here, just for the benefit of those who might not click through:
Bwahahahahaha
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I’m glad you clicked through and read them all … that’s what I thought everyone does … it’s the whole purpose of reblogging! Anyway, yeah, that one was funny, but my favourite, I think, was …
ATTORNEY: The youngest son, the 20-year-old, how old is he?
WITNESS: He’s 20, much like your IQ.
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I’ve read all these before, and I still don’t believe anybody actually said this stuff, but they’re still funny.
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I imagine they are mostly made up, but there were a few that I can easily see being said by a lawyer! But, as long as we get some much-needed humour, then all is well.
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Good one
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Thanks!!!
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Thanks for sharing one of Sally’s great joke collections, Jill! xx Michael
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Thank YOU for reminding me of Sally’s blog! We all need some humour in our lives! xx
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