Yesterday, I started a post about Rick Perry.  It was to be just a post about a ridiculous claim he had made earlier in the week.  We are used to inanity from everyone in the current administration, so, while his comment did cause my jaw to drop, it wasn’t really that unexpected, and I planned to write the post and then put Mr. Perry out of my mind.  But, as I wrote I thought “y’know … people don’t just get this stupid overnight, and there must have been previous signs of such idiocy”.  And so, I went in search of … and after reading for a bit, I decided that it is high time I write another of my Idiot of the Week posts.  And so, allow me to introduce this week’s idiot, Secretary of the Department of Energy, Mr. Rick Perry.  And I simply must begin with the most recent evidence of his condition, for it is what put him onto my radar …

On Connecting the Dots … One Plus One Equals … Four????

No Shit Sherlock.  Dumber Than A Coal Bucket.  You’ve GOT To Be Kidding Me???  Those are the first thoughts that came to mind when I read last night that Department of Energy Secretary Rick Perry said that increased use of fossil fuels will lead to a reduction in sexual assaults.

You still with me here, or are you rolling on the floor laughing?  Yeah, me too.  So, how did he connect the dots to come up with this theory?

“But also from the standpoint of sexual assault. When the lights are on, when you have light that shines the righteousness, if you will, on those types of acts.”  Is he serious???

So, if you burn fossil fuels in Africa, more people will have electricity, so it will not be so dark, so guys won’t rape girls as much if the lights are on.  Brilliant, don’t you think?  Possibly the most incredible theory I have heard yet out of this administration.  Even better than the Civil War being a result of people not being able to compromise on the issue of slavery.

And the Department of Energy spokespeople, bless their little hearts, attempted to spin Perry’s words with this …

“The secretary was making the important point that while many Americans take electricity for granted there are people in other countries who are impacted by their lack of electricity.”

No, excuse me ma’am, but the “secretary” is an IDIOT!

The nation’s largest environmental group, The Sierra Club, apparently agrees with me.  Michael Brune, executive director of the Sierra Club, had this to say …

“It was already clear that Rick Perry is unfit to lead the Department of Energy, but to suggest that fossil fuel development will decrease sexual assault is not only blatantly untrue, it is an inexcusable attempt to minimize a serious and pervasive issue. Women, and particularly women of color, are among some of the most severely impacted by the climate crisis, and it is these same communities that are most at risk of sexual assault. Rick Perry’s attempt to exploit this struggle to justify further dangerous fossil fuel development is unacceptable. He does not deserve to hold office another day with these twisted ideas, and he should resign from his position immediately before he causes any more damage.” 

It is interesting to note that Perry was one of Trump’s first cabinet picks, and was placed in the position of Secretary of U.S. Department of Energy, the very deparment he said he would abolish during his campaign for president in 2012.

And now let’s look at some of the other qualifications Mr. Perry has for receiving this award, for you know my standards are high and one episode of idiocy is rarely sufficient …

His new job …

While he enthusiastically accepted Trump’s nomination last December, it turned out he had absolutely no idea what the job actually entailed.  He thought he would be “a global ambassador for the American oil and gas industry.” Is this man hung up on fossil fuels or what?  Oh yes, I must remember he is a Texan, where oil is king.  But Perry was shocked to discover that two-thirds of the annual departmental budget he would soon oversee is dedicated to maintaining and protecting the United States’ nuclear arsenal.

On climate change …

While not necessarily a climate change denier, he is certainly a skeptic, not convinced that human activities play a significant role.  Read some of his own words on this topic:

• “We cleaned up our air in the state of Texas, more than any other state in the nation during the decade. Nitrous oxide levels, down by 57 percent. Ozone levels down by 27 percent. That’s the way you need to do it, not by some scientist somewhere saying, ‘Here is what we think is happening out there.'”

• “The science is not settled on this. The idea that we would put Americans’ economy at jeopardy based on scientific theory that’s not settled yet to me is just nonsense. Just because you have a group of scientists who stood up and said here is the fact. Galileo got outvoted for a spell.”

• “[Climate change is] all one contrived phony mess that is falling apart under its own weight,Al Gore is a prophet all right, a false prophet of a secular carbon cult, and now even moderate Democrats aren’t buying it.” – from Perry’s book, Fed Up! Our Fight to Save America from Washington, November 2010

• “There are a substantial number of scientists who have manipulated data so that they will have dollars rolling into their projects.”

• “Yes, our climates change. They’ve been changing ever since the earth was formed.”

Last month, Perry said that climate change is a “threat to our nation” and that it is contributing to the recent spate of extreme weather slamming the country. But … he still wants to burn more fossil fuels because he refuses to accept the basic science that climate change is caused by carbon pollution.

During a budget hearing in June, Perry went head-to-head with Senator Al Franken in a heated exchange.

“I did not think that CO2 was the primary knob that changes it. I don’t. I think that there are some other naturally occurring events — the warming and the cooling of our ocean waters and some other activities that occur. I also said in the next breath that man’s impact does, in fact, have an impact on the climate, and the question is: What is going to be the economic impact for this country?”

I hate to tell you this, Rick, but if the earth becomes uninhabitable, the economic impact won’t matter … at all.

Scratching the pharma’s back …

Shortly after his 2006 re-election as Governor of Texas, Perry issued an executive order mandating that sixth-grade girls in Texas be vaccinated against the human papillomavirus—a decision that seemed unusual for a man widely seen as a social conservative. It later surfaced that Perry was close to a pharmaceutical lobbyist, Mike Toomey, who had pressed the case for the vaccine mandate. (And no doubt pressed some money into Perry’s palm.)

He fell for it …

I dunno …

On July 19^th, Perry received a phone call which lasted for 22 minutes.  He was convinced he was speaking to the Ukrainian Prime Minister, Volodymyr Groysman, but in fact he was speaking with two Russian pranksters, Vladimir Krasnov and Alexei Stolyarov, who have become known for targeting celebrities and politicians with audacious stunts.  During the course of the conversation, one of the duo told Perry that Ukrainian President Petro Poroshenko had invented a new biofuel made from home-brewed alcohol and pig manure.  Not even fazed, Perry responded, “I look forward to visiting with the president and getting a more in-depth briefing … If that’s the result, then he’s going to be a very, very wealthy and successful man.”

Dancing with the stars …

Last September, having dropped out of the republican primary race, Perry decided to try something new, and signed on for a season on Dancing with the Stars.  This short video xlip speaks for itself … 

So now, folks, I think you see why I decided to give Mr. Rick Perry this most prestigious award, Filosofa’s Idiot of the Week award!  Perry was one of the few hundred (slight exaggeration) republican candidates who threw their hats in the ring for the 2016 presidential election, and on the one hand, I say I’m glad he dropped out of the race, but then again … look what we did get … sigh.

Mr. Perry … please accept this well-deserved award and be sure to hang it somewhere special in your office so that everyone will see it!