christmas cookies | Filosofa's Word

That sound you hear is my teeth chattering, and all the typos in the forthcoming post are a result of my hands shaking. It’s c-c-cold!!! And it isn’t even winter yet! I am ready for spring … perhaps I’ll plant some flowers here …I presume you are all surviving this harrowing season? I have given up on trying to convince the girls that we ought to skip it this year, and am rather just going with the flow, trying to keep up with baking, shopping, decorating, wrapping and so forth while carving out a bit of time to breathe. It’s about the best I can hope for at the moment.

Grab a warm drink & a Christmas cookie (I baked them just for you guys!) and let’s go find something to start the week out with a smile, or possibly even a chuckle, shall we?

Gem’s cream

It has been cold here, with temps in the teens the past several days, but not nearly as cold as it is for our friend Hugh out in Minnesota! Last Wednesday in southern Minnesota, a tractor-trailer got stuck on an icy hill. Luckily for driver Craig Helgeson, Lizzie and Jacob Hershberger enlisted the help of their team of 13-year-old Belgian draft horses, Molly and Prince, to give the stuck truck a hand. I was actually amazed that only two horses were able to pull that much weight on an icy slope, but they did it. See for yourself!

Remember a few weeks ago when I told you about some ugly food-themed sweaters out for Christmas … I think one was Taco Bell and I don’t recall the other. Today I have found yet another, but frankly, I kind of like this one.After all, who doesn’t love the Dough Boy? General Mills said the sweaters are available in two designs that each feature the Pillsbury Doughboy enjoying the Christmas season. The first sweater (pictured above), titled “Let it Dough,” features the Doughboy and Pillsbury crescent rolls, while the other, dubbed “It’s Lit,” features the mascot with a decorated Christmas tree.

You can get on on Pillsbury’s website for a mere … well, scratch that, for both sweaters are temporarily unavailable, but you can sign up to be notified when they become available.

From the annals of really, really bad ideas comes this …
Yep, folks, it is exactly what it looks like … a bacon vending machine. Now, I know at least one person who I shall not name here who would likely think this is a great idea and that there should be one on every street corner.

The Ohio Pork Council, a trade group for Ohio pork producers, installed a vending machine at Ohio State University’s College of Food, Agricultural, and Environmental Sciences that dispenses cooked, ready-to-eat Smithfield, Hormel and Sugardale bacon. For just $1, you can get either a slice of fully cooked bacon or a handful of fully cooked bacon bits. Now, I dug out the ol’ calculator and concluded that at that rate, it brings the cost of a pound of bacon, for which I typically pay $4, to somewhere around $16. That’s some markup just for the convenience of clogging your arteries with the push of a button!

There is a bright side … proceeds will be donated to Ohio State’s meat science program.

I always enjoy some of the strange, yet humorous signs that are out there … here are a few that are guaranteed to make you either shake your head and roll your eyes, or chuckle.

I wouldn’t want to live here … self-fulfilling prophecy, etc.

I’ll take my own shower, thank you very much!

Oopsie!

And what would Jolly Monday be without one funny animal video?

Have a great week, my friends … keep warm, smile a lot and share your beautiful smile! Love ‘n hugs from Filosofa and Jolly!

Oops! I almost forgot … sorry Benjamin!

Welcome and a Jolly Monday morning to you all! I’ve looked forward to your arrival, and while I waited for you, I baked … COOKIES!!! Come in, grab some coffee, pull up a chair! So, how was your weekend? Mine was fine … nothing too spectacular, except that on Saturday morning I did not get awake and out of bed until … well, until it was no longer Saturday morning! So, I have been running behind schedule all weekend, did not get a second post out on Saturday, and did not keep my promise to Miss Goose to dig through the boxes of Christmas decorations. I did buy some Christmas candy for the jars … whenever I come across the jars. And, I got up early on Sunday morning, thinking to get my grocery shopping done before the crowds came, but that plan was foiled too, for when I arrived at just after 10:00 a.m., the parking lot was already packed! I forgot … there was a six-hour power outage the night before that had Kroger shut down, so everybody and their brother (not to mention their little kids pushing their carts into other shoppers) were there first thing! But alas, I kept my head down, got only what was on the list for the week, and was out within 45 minutes and for under $100, so … mission accompli!

What say we start the week out with some laughs, or at least head-shakers? I’ve gathered an assortment today that I hope will get your week off to a good start. Oh, by the way, do you realize that it is only exactly three weeks ‘til Christmas? Why didn’t somebody tell me sooner? When did they move the date up?

O’ Christmas Tree …

Somebody in Sudbury, Massachusetts bought their Christmas tree last week, and transported it home, as most of us who do not own pick-up trucks do, on the top of their car. A picture is worth a thousand words …

“Sudbury PD would like to remind you to transport your holiday trees responsibly.” No word on whether the driver was stopped, ticketed, or warned.

There are better ways to treat depression …

The rickshaw driver went to the hospital in India complaining of stomach pain. According to Dr. Priyank Sharma …

“The patient was complaining of stomach pain, so we thought of getting an endoscopy done. We were shocked to discover that coins, nails and nut-bolts in his stomach. We come across such a case for the first in our career.”

Dr. Priyank Sharma

The team of doctors, led by Dr. Priyank, found 263 coins and 100 nails in the patient’s stomach. Apparently, he was suffering from depression and this had caused him to start the munching of the metal. According to Dr. APS Geharwar, “Usually, people start eating abnormal things under certain psychological conditions. He had been eating metal for a year but did not tell anyone. Normally, there is no problem until these particles start obstructing the intestines. In this case, the problems had started.”

The metal has been removed from the patient’s stomach, and he is stable, though not considered to be out of the woods yet. People, don’t try this one at home, okay?

Her heart was bigger than her wallet …

I like people who give when they can, whether to a humane society, children’s hospital, homeless shelter, or any of a number of other worthy charities. Danni Messina, 19, a student at Washington State University, may have gotten just a wee bit carried away … easy enough to do around this time of year, when there’s so much good cheer.

Danni wanted to help St. Jude Children’s Research Hospital, a highly worthy cause. But she didn’t quite think this one through. She posted on Twitter that she would donate to St. Jude’s Children’s Hospital — 50 cents for every retweet and 25 cents for every like. There were an awful lot of people out there who were willing to contribute to the cause, especially since it wasn’t hitting their own wallet!

“I was originally planning on donating personally $1,000.” But the tweet quickly amassed $210,000 worth of retweets and likes before she posted that she was cutting off the challenge!

Messina said the $210,000 total is a bit out of her budget, so she started a GoFundMe to help raise the money she promised to St. Jude’s.

“I am still in shock. I think it’s so incredible that people are donating because they saw my tweet. I love the awareness part of it, and it’s been awesome talking to St. Jude more.”

I imagine she learned a lesson that will stay with her throughout her lifetime!

What’s in a name?

Choosing a baby’s name isn’t rocket science, right? Hmmmm … maybe not, but it can certainly be angst-inducing. Donnie and I fought bitterly over the name for our first, and he finally gave in to me when we were told that I could not leave the hospital until I named the baby. To this day, daughter Chris still has no middle name, for that would have led to murder for sure! The second wasn’t a huge problem, but the third led to yet more fighting. So, it really is a big deal sometimes.

Justin and Jordan Garton of Fort Smith, Arkansas, love Olive Garden restaurants. In 2015, they bought a “never ending pasta pass”, and committed to eating there every single day for 6-7 weeks to ensure they got their money’s worth. The love Olive Garden so much, in fact, that they have decided to name their baby, due this month, after the eatery, only with a bit of adaptation: Olivia Garton.

According to a spokesperson for Olive Garden, “We couldn’t have been more thrilled upon hearing about the Garton’s growing family. We always love hearing the unique ways our guests have been able to connect with Olive Garden, and we can’t wait to meet baby Olivia.”

The Gartons said they hid one other Easter egg in baby Olivia’s name: Her middle name will be Michelle, making her initials “O.M.G.” “I guess we just have to be those hashtag millennial parents,” Jordan Garton said.

Um … okay … I guess …

Life in the fast lane …

You know those carpool lanes some cities have on their expressways? The ones that are only for cars with more than one occupant, and you can be ticketed if you violate that rule? Well, a Texas driver thought she was being pretty smart in figuring a way around the rules. Her ‘passenger’ …

… was actually a mannequin, decked out in sunglasses, lipstick, a blond wig and a zip-up sweater while sitting in the passenger seat of the vehicle.

Ted Heap, Harris County Constable for Precinct 5, has been cracking down on violators of this rule of late, and in reviewing the video from November 30^th, they spotted this fake right away. Frankly, from the picture, I’m not sure I would have noticed, but then my eyes aren’t all that sharp! Anyway, the woman who saved a bit of time and a $3.20 toll that day, will now miss a day’s work to go to court, and faces a possible $150 fine! Goes to show what my grandpa always said, “Crime doesn’t pay”.

Well, my dear friends, we need to get a move on, for you don’t want to start the week out being late to work! And this week, as I have my new dryer, I am once again happily going to gather a load of towels to wash! I would remind you that even though it is the ‘Holly Jolly’ season, the season of ho ho ho, mistletoe, and lots of brightly-coloured lights, many suffer a bit of depression, some loneliness, during this time. Give people an extra smile, stop a moment and say, “Hi, how are you today?”, check on your elderly neighbors. These things are more in the spirit of giving than buying a gift. Keep warm, keep safe, and have a happy week! I love you all!