I have been remarkably silent for the last couple of months. In part, this was due to the holidays and all the frou-frou that accompanies Hallowe’en/Thanksgiving/Christmas/New Year, and in part it was due to a respiratory infection that laid me low for several weeks. But I am back in the saddle now and raring to go. I will, no doubt, do more than my share of bitching, ass-kicking and “inciting to riot” in the next 12 months, so I thought I would begin 2015 with some humour, many thanks to my daughter and her good-natured (I hope) bandmates.
In 2014, the band (Cincinnati Caledonian Pipes and Drums) decided to purchase a second hand bus. In years past, they had relied on a combination of personal vehicles and rented vans to transport musicians and instruments to competitions and felt that the time had come to invest in a more permanent means of transport. They got a good deal on a used Metro bus and bought it.
So, the first real test of endurance for the new bus was today, a journey of some 600 miles to Kansas City to participate in the annual Winter Storm competition. The following is an excerpt from text messages between my daughter, Chris (snare/tenor drummer for the band) and myself (innocent bystander). All comments are Chris’ unless otherwise noted:
• (09:07) On our way. Bus stalling at stops. Booo. Doing well on the interstate, though. Frost on the inside of the windows. Glad I brought a blankie. My wallet broke when I tried to put my money in it. I love you.
• (16;03) It is way too cold here.
Just took a potty/fuel break … 5 hours or so more to go
• (16:39) Bus is finally toasty. They put cardboard on the radiator. We lost our first piece and they covered it too much the second time and bus started running hot. Front doors flew open a few hours ago. What an adventure. I’ll be glad to get home safe.
• (16:51) Doors just opened again. This has been an eye-opening trip. Now we know what things need to be worked on before its next voyage in May.
o Me: Need to get the door problem fixed in KC before heading home on Sunday. That could be a serious safety issue. The door thing could cause a wreck or could cause one of you to be sucked out of the bus. We fix in KC, yes? I will pay if needs be.
• (17:02) Oh we have plenty of money. We will have it looked at. We’ve learned we have to turn the heat off when we go up hills.
o Me: BWAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH WHOOOOOO HEEEEEEEE … good thing you aren’t crossing the Rockies! Jeez … you must keep a journal for this trip! I think I can sell the story to some sitcom producer! Is Seinfeld still in production?
• (17:19) Jeff, who didn’t come, has suggested we all lean forward and fart when we’re going uphill.
o Me: Great idea … hats off to Jeff! Good thing I put lots of beans in the soup last night!
• (17:53) We’ve given up on the bus. Trying to get rentals now. They think it’s the transmission. We’re safe. Parked it at a hotel.
• (17:57) Ok … we’re near St. Louis … just past. We’re in the warm hotel and I think we’ve just secured rental vehicles.
• (18:07) The happy news is that the rentals will be much more trustworthy.
• (23:18) Here safe.
So, all’s well that ends well. I’m not sure what their plan is to get the bus home, but they got a really good deal on it, remember? Hopefully they will have a great weekend playing the music they all love and re-connecting with old friends from other bands across the nation.
Now, there was the promised laugh to start out the New Year. Sadly, not too many are laughing tonight in Paris where terrorists attacked the offices of the satirical publication Charlie Hebdo a few days ago, killing 12 and injuring many others. And sadly, I am finding no humour in a publication that crossed my desk condemning homosexuals yet again. And amusingly the republicans about to take office in Congress are still scratching their collective butts trying to figure out what to do with the seats they won two months ago, and … well, the list goes on, so it looks like I have my work cut out for the beginning of 2015. So don’t be surprised to see my comments on the above and many other issues in the coming weeks, be prepared to disagree heartily (yet respectfully, please) with my take on things. I also plan to review a number of books this year, as well as at least two movies: Selma and Unbroken (based on the book by Laura Hillenbrand which I reviewed in 2011). As I said, I am back in the saddle and, for better or for worse, I will be Speaking My Mind in 2015! Looking forward to seeing you soon!